


A Sudden Thaw

by RachaelGold



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-10
Updated: 2018-05-10
Packaged: 2019-05-04 19:43:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14600328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RachaelGold/pseuds/RachaelGold
Summary: An overheard conversation prompts Chakotay to take one final shot at winning Kathryn.Setting: post Endgame





	A Sudden Thaw

Chakotay gazed across the room at the vision that was Kathryn Janeway. Spirits, he'd forgotten how beautiful she looked when she smiled. He'd never seen her look lovelier, dressed exquisitely for the occasion, and smiling easily. Released from command and from the responsibility for over a hundred lives, she looked dazzling and relaxed. There were several rather interested men, he noticed with a deep stab of jealousy. One in particular seemed to be gaining her attention. Old feelings stirred in him. He had longed for this woman for over half a decade, only recently making a genuine attempt to move on. 

He secluded himself in a place where he could watch her unobserved. Behind a pillar, he could indulge in a few precious moments of quiet fantasy. Seven was otherwise occupied with some of the other crew at the moment, or he could never have gotten away with it. 

She was talking to a group of high ranking officials, laughing at their jokes, entertaining them with comments of her own. Occasionally, when the music diminished, he could make out the joyful flutter of her laughter or the deep huskiness of her voice. 

One of the men put his hand on the small of her back, and it made his flesh creep. Why should it still bother him? He was with Seven now. He should be the one everyone envied here. But deep down he knew that wasn't true. 

Nearby, he'd been aware of three of his former crewmembers talking for some time, but their conversation hadn't impinged on him until the word _Janeway_ had penetrated his mind. 

"Damn! That's one hot woman!" 

"You're a married man now, Tom. You shouldn't be thinking things like that!" admonished Ayala. 

"Let me tell you, I often had thoughts like that about Janeway. There's something dead sexy about a woman in command…" 

"And she ain't bad looking either," commented a third voice Chakotay didn't recognise. 

"Wouldn't mind having a crack at her myself." 

"Forget it, Ayala. There was only one person on the ship that ever stood a chance, and he's stuffed it right up. She'll never look at him now." 

"Yeah, any idiot could see she only had eyes for him…except the idiot in question." Chakotay's pulse-rate accelerated. Surely they didn't mean him? 

"G-d knows what he sees in Seven...well, apart from the obvious external attributes. He'll soon tire of those. I don't suppose for a second she knows how to use them..." Holy sh--! They did mean him! 

"Yeah. You're probably right." 

"Can you imagine sleeping with her? It would be like bedding an android. All mechanics and no passion." 

"Might be an interesting experience, though! Just once. She has one amazing body!" 

Chakotay slunk away, a lump in his throat. There was no denying their scathing comments were about him, and maybe he thoroughly deserved them. He had stuffed it up, he knew that. He was with the wrong woman now. He didn't need three irreverent crewmen to tell him that. He'd been temporarily smitten by youth and curvaceous beauty, but he knew these things were a poor substitute for passion and vibrancy. And a deep enduring friendship. They were right. He was an idiot, and he had let his chances slip away. 

As he made his way back towards Seven, he glanced again at Kathryn. A bitter taste filled his mouth as he saw her leaning in close to a man who was whispering in her ear. He heard her laugh unrestrainedly, and the jealousy bit into him ever more deeply. He finally couldn't hide it from himself any longer. This was the woman of his dreams, and he still wanted her. 

* * *

  


Hours later, he saw Kathryn step out into the darkened gardens alone, and knew that maybe fate had thrown him one last chance. With a quick glance round to ensure he wouldn't be followed, he pushed into the shadows himself. 

The cool air hit him immediately, but it was welcome after the heat of the ballroom. It took a few seconds for his eyes to adjust before he caught sight of her form lingering at the far end of the balcony. 

"Taking a few moments to yourself?" he asked the dim figure. 

She turned towards him. "Yes. It is rather hot in there…and to tell you the truth, I need a few moments of peace." 

"I noticed. They've hardly let you alone all evening. I haven't had a chance to talk to you." 

"Oh? I apologize if I've been neglectful…but I thought you were probably rather well occupied." 

"So were you, judging by the number of men paying you attention tonight!" he said, a hint of his jealousy showing in his voice. They stared at each other in silence through the darkness. Had she detected that tone of regret? If she had, she was making no comment on it. "Kathryn, I don't think I can bear to see you with another man." 

Kathryn looked at him in shock, wondering where this confession had suddenly come from. "Chakotay! I hate to point it out to you! You're the one with another woman!" she blustered indignantly. 

"Not the one I want to be with!" He stepped towards her and rested his hands on her bare arms. It sent a surge of electricity coursing through both of them. "Kathryn…listen to me! It's you I love." 

Her eyes searched his uncertainly, and he used her hesitancy to haul her into his arms and kiss her hungrily. 

For a few stunned seconds, she seemed to accept the invasion of his tongue, but then she shook herself violently out of his grip and pushed him forcefully away. "No! Chakotay…STOPPPPP!" came her outraged response. She flared at him angrily, and Chakotay shrank under the frosty glare. Disappointment swept through him and he felt a renewed bitterness storm his heart. 

"Spirits, I am a fool! I should have known. Still the proverbial ice queen! Damn you, Kathryn! You've spent years flirting with me, toying with my feelings, and you never once had any intention of letting me in!" 

"How dare you! How can you possibly know how I feel?" 

Chakotay's eyes flashed angrily, as he watched her through the darkness. Her chest was heaving, as she steadied her breathing. She'd slowly been driving him insane. Didn't she know how her aloof attitude had pained him over the years? How her indifference had said it all? "You haven't the capacity to love. Your heart is frozen beyond redemption!" he spat vengefully. 

"Chakotay…you have no idea! If you really think that, why the hell are you here?" She stepped away from him, trying to contain her own annoyance and biting her lip. 

"I honestly don't know!" 

He stood there watching her resentfully, torn between making a swift exit and letting rip with more of his recriminations. He was trying to exercise restraint, but he dearly wanted to continue his condemnation of her. A part of him wanted to hurt her as badly as she was hurting him right now. 

"I think I'd better leave," he commented, taking a few steps back towards the ballroom doors, "before I say any more words I will regret." 

Kathryn seemed suddenly to realise that she might be making a huge mistake in letting this man leave thinking as he did. "Chakotay?" came her plaintive voice, the anger gone now. 

He paused, and half-turned. She waited a moment, as she considered how she would phrase what she wanted to say. 

"My reaction would have been very different, if you'd come to me a free man," she finished. 

He turned fully now. Did she say what he thought she had? She was staring at him now with a look of expectancy…almost hopefulness. His breath caught, and suddenly he knew that the chance he'd hoped for was there after all. 

"I am a free man. I've made no promises to Seven." 

"You're in a relationship and that's enough. She is decidedly taking the long term view." 

"Well, that is _decidedly_ presumptuous and premature on her part," he said, thinking resentfully of Seven's possessiveness, something he'd already had to deal with. He hadn't been ready to take their relationship to that level of commitment. He knew why now. 

He looked at her thoughtfully. "Kathryn, if I came to you tomorrow free of her, would it make a difference?" 

"It would make a world of difference," came her husky voice, vibrating with warmth. 

"Would you finally let me in? Would you give me your heart?" 

Kathryn stepped back towards him, and gazed lovingly into his eyes. 

She took a deep breath. "You already have it. Didn't you know? Chakotay, you've had it for years." 

"Oh, Kathryn! D-do you mean it?" he asked, hardly daring to believe. 

"Yes, I do." 

He reached out his hand to her arm again…tentatively this time, but she didn't back away. 

"I need something. I need some token to show me you mean it," he pleaded. "Please. Give me something." 

She hesitated for a moment, then stepped back into his arms. This time she kissed him…not hungrily as earlier...but softly and tenderly. The kiss went on and on. Tongues began to explore, hands began to wrap lovingly round the other. This was the embrace of two dear friends who cared deeply about each other, but wanted so much more. They were showing their affection whilst reining in deeper feelings for the time being. The passion was there in promise, but could wait till later. 

Finally she stepped back with a smile, her fingers lingering for just a few seconds on his breast. "Will that do?" 

He smiled in response. "It was perfect…for now. But not for tomorrow. I'll want so much more tomorrow!" 

"How much? What is it you want from me, Chakotay?" she asked, a tiny hint of apprehension in her voice. 

He wasn't a fool. He could hear the hitch in her voice, and he felt a sudden pang of guilt for never having laid things out honestly for her before. He thanked the spirits for giving him this one last chance. "Everything and a lifetime. Love, physical intimacy and commitment. And marriage," he answered without pause, "if you'll have me..." 

Kathryn nodded her understanding and relaxed a little. "Till tomorrow then," she said, giving him a reassuring squeeze of the hand. Then, she let his hand slip from hers and vanished. 

* * *

  


Less than twenty-four hours later, Chakotay found himself smiling across the table at Kathryn, as they both fell silent. She had cooked him a surprisingly pleasant meal, and the coffee cups were drained. The conversation had so far been light, except for a discussion about Seven's reaction to the ending of their relationship. 

He'd arrived bearing a beautiful bouquet of flowers, and had kissed her only briefly on the cheek as he handed them over. He had wanted them to relax together for a while, but now the moment of truth had come. 

He swept his eyes tenderly over her lovely face and leaned back in his chair. "So Kathryn…are you ready for this?" 

She took a long time to answer and the _yes_ was a little shaky when it came. However, it was accompanied with a delightful smile. He lifted a hand in a gesture of invitation. 

She stood, dropping her napkin on the table and came round to his side of the table. He pushed his chair back and angled himself towards her. She knelt down beside him and placed one of her hands over his. 

"I have to confess to being a little nervous here. I don't want to disappoint you." 

"Well, that makes two of us. I don't want to disappoint you either, but I think there's little chance of either of us being disappointed. We'll bluff our way through at the very least." He leaned forward and caught her lips. The kiss was gentle and teasing, a foretaste of things to come. 

They broke off, and breathily exchanged smiles of anticipation. "I love you so much, Kathryn. I have for a very long time. If I've never told you before, it was because I was being a prize idiot and not being honest with you. For that I am truly sorry, but I hope you aren't in any doubt of my feelings now." 

She tipped her head in acceptance. "And I love you too. I have for a very long time. If I've never told you before…" Her words were smothered by a fierce kiss, more passionate and demanding than the first. When Chakotay broke away, they both laughed. 

"Kathryn Janeway is on her knees!" Chakotay said with a twinkle in his eye. "Anyone would think she's about to propose!" 

"That wasn't my intention. But if we don't muck this up entirely, I'll get down on my knees and propose to you later, if you like!" 

"Oh yes, Kathryn!" 

"Totally naked!" she added huskily, a saucy grin spreading on her lips. 

Chakotay nearly choked on his excitement. "Oh spirits...I definitely would like…C-can I...hold you to that? Is that a promise?" 

"It is if you want it to be." 

"More than anything, my darling." 

"Okay," Kathryn smiled. "It's a promise." She got up, swinging one leg over his knees, and deposited herself in his lap. She was straddling him rather suggestively, one arm over each of his shoulders. Chakotay was by now buzzing with arousal, and he could feel himself stir against her heat. He could hardly believe this was happening. After all this time. 

He sighed happily as he allowed her to kiss him this time, hardly able to reconcile this sexy impassioned woman with the one he'd accused of being frozen only the day before. He felt her hands burying into his hair, her hot breath on his neck, her lips silkily exploring the contours of his face. The electricity was running wildly through him, he was rapidly becoming dizzy with sensation. Dimly, he wondered how he was managing to stay conscious. He almost had to remind himself to breathe. If anyone was melting around here, maybe it was him! 

Kathryn broke off, still holding his head firmly in her hands, and they stared long and deeply into each other's eyes. 

Then they laughed again, breaking the spell. 

Another kiss, and Kathryn finally spoke. "Well, Chakotay, how would you like to melt an ice queen's heart?" 

He smiled. "It'd be my pleasure, ma'am, but...I thought it was pretty well on the way already!" 

"Oh, I absolutely agree! I think things are hotting up rather nicely around here...but there's still a way to go before meltdown! This project needs a lot more work, Commander!" 

"Is that a fact? I'll have to try a bit harder then," he suggested, before experimenting with another demanding kiss. His hands had, by now, gone on an adventure all of their own. "Kathryn, my love," he broke off breathlessly, "Can we take this through into the bedroom?" 

"Actually, I think that would be a rather smart move," she conceded, her fingers slipping tantalisingly onto his chest. "Or this ice queen of yours might dissolve into complete and utter mush on the carpet! And you really wouldn't want to clean up the mess in the morning!" 


End file.
